30 Years of Packing for Safari (into a 15kg Duffle)

I have to come clean here. First and foremost I am a world-class petty smuggler. I have been doing this for years — generator spare parts, plumbing contraptions, kosher chicken, light bulbs; you name it, I have schlepped it across Africa. So first into the bag goes stuff for operations and squished around that are white, grey and olive tops, khaki bottoms and black for evening chic (which I never get to wear but still faithfully pack. Hope springs eternal).

There are six very important points to keep in mind before you start planning your safari attire:

1. All the best safari lodges in Africa do your laundry at no cost

2. Animals, other than primates and birds, are colour blind so if you do want to pack a little something lumo (aka neon) that’s absolutely fine

3. You can’t overdo the leopard accessories — you are on safari after all

4. Never sacrifice safari comfort for safari chic (ladies, safari hair is all the rage)

5. You are seldom at the same lodge for more than four nights

6. With only a 15kg allowance be sure to keep space for shopping 

Now, what to pack. I know you love a list so here goes — a list-with-a-twist:

Five other essentials I never leave home without:

One last essential, and something I never travel without, is an immaculate pedicure. You never know when your shoes might have to come off and who might be watching.